Q. Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he got shot. Q. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he was stapled to the first monkey.

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What is meant by the term 'Biological control''? Not ending up on the Jeremy Kyle Show.

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A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

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What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

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ask me if I'm a tree.. are you a tree? no.

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What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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poo

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Why was the little boy cold? Cause he was traped In a fridge

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Two black men go inside a movie theater. They sit down and watch the movie.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? Another successful moon landing by NASA in which the African-American astronaut went on a successful moon walk.

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Why was the black family eating KFC? Because KFC tastes very nice and there was a discount on the family bucket.

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the economy.

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

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What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

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What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

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A bar walks into a man

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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A White guy invites his Black friends into his house, he says "Make yourself at home." THEY DO

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"What's up?" "A movie about an old man who takes his house to South America by tying balloons to it, who accidentally brings along a young boy with him and they have an adventure."

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Why did the man take a shower?, he didint smell so good...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops