What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

What do you get when you skin a potato? A screaming kid with autism and no skin.

Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

A blind man is jumped and doesn't see it coming

Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

were you expecting a joke

What's the difference bettween the holocaust and a bee, 6 million jews died during the holocaust. Bees make honey.

Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

So you have been really stressed lately huh?

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

What's big and messy? A big mess

Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

if you want to see somthing funny, throw a small child imbertween two catholic priests!

What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

Why does a squirel swim on his back? Because it was trying to keep his nuts clean

Knock knock no answer, as the tenant of the house was out shopping.

Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...