How do you get a clown to stop laughing? You throw an awe at it. Why did Sally fall off the swing? .....I missed the clown

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If a tree falls in the woods, how many animals lost their home to deforestation?

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Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

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Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

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Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

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What do you get when you multiply two by three? Six.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

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Two cows are standing in a field. One says to the other, 'Have you heard about this mad cow disease?' and the other says 'Good thing we're penguins.'

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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