what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a brand new Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

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why does the gay guy like anal-sex? because he's gay.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

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Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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