you're momma's so fat, and i like fat chicks. is she home?

What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm. Being raped. What's worse than being raped. Being raped twice. What's worse than being raped twice. Biting into your apple and finding a worm then throwing away that apple, retrieving another apple them biting into it and finding another worm then being raped twice. In the same 5 minutes.

why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

why was the woman crying? her son killed 5 people.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

Why do hummingbirds hum? They don't realize how annoying it is.

Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

What do you get when you mix Jabba the Hut with a hen? nothing, genetically they are unable to reproduce due to the disproportionate number of chromosomes and DNA

One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

what do you call a black man, white man, mexican, irishman, indian, and chinese man being hung at the same time? -a racially diverse pirate crew

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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