How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

A panda walks into a bar, orders some bamboo shoots, and bamboo leaves, and eats them

Fun Fact: If you lay out all of the veins in your body out, You will die

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

what's worse than pie? alot of things.

Q: How many Jews can u fit in a bathtub? A: Well it depends if you use their ashes.

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

what did the black mother think of her daghter's white boyfreind? i dont know i cant read minds

What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy. But I have Alzheimer's... Hey, I just met you...

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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