What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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drugs.

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What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

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The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

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bangers and mash?

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Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

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whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

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What is red and has two legs? Half a cat.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops