If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

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The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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Roses are red, yup.

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When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

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Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

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What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

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What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

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Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

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What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

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whats worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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What do you call an Asian guy doing homework? A student

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops