So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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Your momma is so black that she probably has ancestors indigenous to Africa.

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

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When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

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What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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