roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "I just found out I have AIDS"

How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

Knock Knock! F*ck off

can you touch your toes? no

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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