the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

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Wow Nero, you never explained the process, its like I am at the ocean again, but dont lie, you still fear showers... Sorry its just not you when you lie to me, I know I should be more concerned about you, ill bring those old stuff, im tired, sleepy, I suppose thats your work huh Nero? Thanks, call it as a brother or what you want, but I really love you and wont ever stop doing so. Goodnight Nerochan, promise me you will take care of yourself, we all got a long life ahead of us, and I want to spend more time with you, if its fine for you and your wife.

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Fine, start by proving to me that you can be a reasonable human being, and I will meet you myself, I have too many of those that rely on my guidance and protection in order for me to send myself off to some suicide mission. Say, are you familiar with the Antony Stark method?

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there are three women witch one is married? the one with the ring on its finger

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How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

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What did the blind boy get for one of his Christmas present? A cinema ticket.

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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Why did little Lynn fall of her bike? Because she has no legs.

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Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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Not gonna tell you, that was one weird story, I feel like super high right now.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Two lifelong friends walk into the locl Bar and each order a Beer. " So how's life treating ya?" Phil replies, " Well Doug, I've got Stage Four Lung Cancer. I'm going to Die, remember?" Unfortunately, Doug doesn't remember because Doug has a Brain Tumor.

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

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yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

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Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

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knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

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Yo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!!

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A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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