How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

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Lambos are red Tuxedos are Blue The cat is out of the bag Shit, we're all gonna die in helll

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How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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=3

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already taken her police statement and she doesn't want to discuss the incidentit anymore until her lawyer arrives.

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

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What's big, black, and girls love to ride on? A horse

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

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Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, In Soviet Russia, Poem writes you.

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What do you call a girl with one leg? Eileen

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Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not?

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What did the doctor say to the man on the nice day? You have cancer. How nice the day was is irrelevant

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A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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Why did the dog chase the cat. Cause he was fking hungry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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