A hero is nice to everyone, but one person. who is that? Your mom. WOOOOOOOT!! YOU JUST GOT MUSCLEMANED!!!!

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I used to be an Adventurer like you, but then i took and arrow to the Elbow.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

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Knock Knock Who is there? *bang* The following story depicts the life and death of Bob:___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________then he opened the door and was shot in the face.

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What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

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Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

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Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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A jewish boy walks past a quarter on the ground..

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How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

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Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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What do you call Chuck Norris being killed? This is impossible so we are not give it a name.

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Why did the bird plummet to the earth? It was shot.

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

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What's long and black? A long and black object.

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A Black Guy, A Rabbi, And A Mexican walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says "Get Outta Here We're Closed!"

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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What kind of drugs should you take when you are too stressed? Fabulous secret magic drugs, makes all your problems go away... TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! Warning: When you take drugs, you are taking a very big DRUG.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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