A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

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Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops