What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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