What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

A man walked into a bar. I shot him

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

Hello

how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

Why did the seagull fly over the sea, It had wings.

The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

What do you get when you cross a dog with an anteater? An animal unlikely to survive beyond infancy.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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