why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

whats green and red green and red green and red? a frog in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What does a person with Alzheimer's do? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what happened to those kids sandusky raped? who cares

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the clown fall out of the tree? He got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman come across a magic slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Englishman slides down screaming "SILVER!", and lands in a heap of silver at the bottom. The Scotsman takes his turn, and shouts "WEEEE!" as he slides down. He gets up and realises what a needless waste of a wish his enjoyment cost him.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Hey man. what? squidbillies.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops