Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

whats orange and cant talk? an orange

Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The black man is alive.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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