A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

What do you put your key on? A key chain.

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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