A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

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You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

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OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

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Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

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What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

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You're tearing apart, Lisa!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

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ever tried african food? they neither

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ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

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What happens when you put a baby, a dog and a cat in the same bag They will all most likely suffocate if left in the bag too long

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

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What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

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What's black and white and read all over? Corn, I lied about everything.

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What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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