There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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Who job is it to protect the forest? Obiously a male and/or female forest ranger of smokey the bear. It's that simple.

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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