Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

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jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

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-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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What happened after Jimmy fell off the cliff? He died.

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What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing you insensitive ass!

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

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What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

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What was the asian person's name? I don't know, I never met him.

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

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how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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