Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? It's Doctor Green. I've got some bad news about your test results. Can I come in?

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

Your mommas so dumb she had to climb a glass wall to see what was on the other side! But the glass was slippy so she never saw what was on the other side.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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