A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Hi, this is Luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A Lion walked into bar. He ordered a steak Because lions love meat.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is the difference between a Homosexual and a Heterosexual? They are both Black.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's black, white and sings the intro theme song for "Thomas the Tank Engine" while tap-dancing? There probably isn't anything that does that.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How many calories are in a bag of Fritos? 160 calories.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Whats better then a guard llama two Guard llamas

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was Little Timmy crying ? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus. Knock-Knock! Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are black. Violets black. Guns are black. My van is black.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's awesome and rides a unicycle? Rollercoasters. I lied about the unicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

a man with a scar on his right hand walked in to a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x z y.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the duck walk on the moon? Because it was his lifelong goal

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops