what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

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whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

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Stop. Seriously stop.

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

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What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

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What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

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Yo mamma so poor she got a job.

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What did the boy with no parents get for Christmas from his Grampa? Nothing because his Grampa had alzheimer's disease -Flap

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jess always squints her eyes when making a point

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What did the cow say to the chicken? - Muuuuhhhhhhhhh!

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

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what do you call a mexican being baptized? a mexican becoming christian.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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Q: How do you turn a purple panda into a red panda A: Feed it grey poop and because it tasted so bad it got so mad it turned red.

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no rasist joks

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What do you call a woman in the kitchen? Her name.

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knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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