Jingle bells, jingle bells SHIT MY FOOT

Your mom is so fat that her Body Mass Index is 30,?which is considered obese, she should really try to lose some weight.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have cancer."

How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

why dose micheal jackson like 29 year olds Because there is 20 of them

Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

i bought a sock i wore it i bought a fish i killed it i bought a human i ate it IM A CANNIBAL

What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

Why couldn't Horton hear a who? He was a loaf of bread.

Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

Holy mother moley! Britain just brexited! Now there's no more Britain. Britain is all gone.

A blonde walks into a bar, and hit it head on, she is now in the hospital grasping for her life but the threatening grips of hell keep pulling her into the wretched plains of fiery wrath and despair... -Avery Vartanian

Black people stink of shite!

If a black person gets a tan, what do you get? A burned black sausage.

How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

XD I TOTALLY CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THAT ONE! XD IT WAS LIKE SO OBVIOUS! XD

Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...