knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

A Hispanic man, an African woman, and a Caucasian man walk into a bar. No one wins this round of "Racial Equality Appreciation Day's" game of limbo.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

Q: Wy couldn't the T-rex grab the other Dinosor? A: Because he is extinct.

What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

Kobe Bryant passing the ball

What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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