- Anti Joke

What's green and black? Grass with wheels.

Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

In Soviet Russia, it is usually cold throughout the year, as it is located in a colder region of the planet.

why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was dead

Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

How do you make a snake blink? You can't

what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

Katniss: Don't worry Prim, your not getting picked for the reaping this year! Effie: First Tribute, Primrose Everden! Katniss: Oh sh*t.

What did the blind girl say? Its dark in here.

I can't hear you. I have carrots in my ears.

I'm 23, just like most people my age.

Justin Beiber has fame, his own bodyguards, he has performed many shows and has everyone's attention. What do you have? A penis.

What do you call a tortilla from venezuela? A tortilla.

Why shouldn't you go to California? Because there are sharks there, obviously.

What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

Roses are black. Violets black. Guns are black. My van is black.

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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