"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

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why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

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Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

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What kind of Mexican makes no money? A Mexican without a job.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I can't remember. I have amnesia from when I was hit by a bus as a child.

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So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

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A serial killer walks into a bar... He is finally arrested after killing several people within the bar, goes to court, and it was decided that he is suffering from a rare case of maddening schizophrenia, and sent indefinitely to a mental hospital...

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What is black white green blue and is wet and blind and deaf and homosexual all at the same time? What ever I just described

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Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What do you call an Arabic man who crashed a plane into a business building? A careless pilot whose recklessness caused him to crash into a building. His stupidity and lack of plane control skill led to a horrible accident that involved the death of thousands of innocent people and the death of many business people's office pets.

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-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

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Why did the woman stop running? She was an escaped convict that had been on the run for twelve years and the police had finally found the place where she was hidding. Upon arriving at her house she started to open fire on the three police cars, hit two cops and killed one more. The two are fine and are going through physical therapy as they were both hit in the spine and have a difficult time performing the smallest task. The one was one called billy. Billy had died in the hospital after asking if they had got her. He died believing a lie. They never got her. She is still on the run, I lied about her stopping.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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A man has a meeting with his doctor and his doctor says "I have some bad news, you have cancer and you have alzheimer's," to which the man replies... "Well at least I don't have cancer." This is an example of a fallacy claim.

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roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

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What did the student say to the teacher, after being assigned homework? This isn't my best subject, can I stay after class for tutoring?

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What is white and can fly? A fridge that can't fly.

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What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

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what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

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Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

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Q: Whats the difference between a table and a Mexican? A: You tell me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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