A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

What did Jay Z say to his long lost friends? Allow me to reintroduce myself, my names Jay - Z

What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

What do you get from M&M bags? M&Ms.

A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

What was the little boys least favorite part of Christmas? Getting raped by his uncle.

How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

Why is my phone bill so low this month? Because you have no friends.

Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

Why is Ian's name Ian? Because he was adopted

What is the difference between a blond and a mummy? A blond has a brain.

Knock knock It's open, come in

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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