What's white and horny? A unicorn

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Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Sucks to be a fish.

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what word starts with 'p' and ends in 'orn'? popcorn you sickos

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

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Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

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How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

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What did the policeman say to the black thief? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do may be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to consult an attorney before speaking to the police and to have an attorney present during questioning now or in the future. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you before any questioning, if you wish. If you decide to answer any questions now, without an attorney present, you will still have the right to stop answering at any time until you talk to an attorney. Knowing and understanding your rights as I have explained them to you, are you willing to answer my questions without an attorney present.

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? None because alligators don't fly.

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

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a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops