a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

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What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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Why can't you teach drivers ed and sex ed at the same time in Iraq? The camel would get tired.

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How do you make a mess? Microwave a baby.

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How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You can't, because there aint any.

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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How do you tell if an albino baby is black? Check his genetics.

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Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

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What do grass and deer have in common? They're both green I lied about the deer

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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How do you fit a billion llamas into a box? you dont

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Whats more fun than swinging a baby around on a clothesline at 200 miles per hour ? Stopping it with a shovel

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get to the hospital before he lost to much blood from his stab wound.

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cops:knock- knock person: who's there? cops: the cops person: the cops who cops: we found the body #Casey Anthony

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What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

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Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

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How do you starve a black man?.........take away his food!!

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I'm homeless.

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Yo mamas so fat she's over weight

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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