The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

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Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies. I'd rather had the porsche in my garage

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Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

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An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

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Whats worse than finding a maggot in your apple? Getting Raped

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cuz he was black.

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roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

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What sound does a dog make? WOOF What sound does a cat make? MEOW What sound does a giraffe make? ...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What do you call a terrible Therapist that shoots coke up his nose? Sickman, Sickman Fraud.

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Whet doesn't kill you, probably will next time.

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Whats green and smells like grass? Grass scented air freshener, in a green colored can.

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Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

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hey fat ass u want some butter with them rolls?

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This guy went to the store because he needed potatoes. So he asked the clerk where the potatoes were at and she said "Isle fiveeeeeee!" So he went there and there were no potatoes ! hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahajhahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaahahahahahhhhahha

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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