Why did an old man cause a car accident? He gotf a heart attack.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

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What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

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whats worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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What is funnier then 25 9/11

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Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

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"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

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What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

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What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

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alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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