Chuck Norris does not get sick; He only gets sick when his immune system is weak.

How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

What did the atheist say to the jew. Well first they had a long discussion about religion and the jew was actually made an atheist. Truly the work of God.

Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

why cant the kid find any friends? he was stranded in a desert.

A white man walked into a bar, and an indian walked into a totem pole...

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

Why is little johnny sad? He won the lottery but then found out the next day he had cancer and cried in a corner.

What's one plus one? two.

how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who?

How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

What does aaron eat for dinner Answer- Fat Finger HAHAHAHAHA

why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...