Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's black and white and red all over? Half of a zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I viewed the terms of service and did not agree to them.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did the n i g g e r with alzheimers say to the c h i n k? 9/11 was the funniest fake joke since the holocaust and 9/11 and the holocaust and 9/11... and... what?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Asians look like they have down syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

John has 37 candy bars and eats 36 of them? What does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I put my baby in a microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

thumb_up thumb_down -4

a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops