A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

Military intelligence.

Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

Kenny G

Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

why did the man come out of the closet? because the dark scares him and it smelled like moth balls

How many gays does it take to turn a lightbulb? 1

Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

GRAAAAAAAR.

Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

How do you make a grilled cheese for a black guy? Butter two pieces of bread, place two slices of any kind of cheese in between the pieces of bread, then fry it in a pan with butter.

What did the man say to hitler? hi hitler.

Matt swam through watter. Gaby drowned on dry land.

Q: What do you call a group of asians riding their bikes while carrying large bags of merchandise filled with an ample amount of video games? A: Obviously, a few enviromentally-friendly entrepreneurs who managed to make enough of a profit via their established buisness to the extent that they could buy what they required and get some other desired items as well.

Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

Turtles

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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