knock knock you may come in

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

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How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

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What does a blonde's vagina taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage

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why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other-side

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Why did the man break into the bank? Because he was a bank robber

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What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

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LAMBORGHINI MERCY, YO CHICK SHE SO THIRSTY! IM IN THAT 2 SEAT LAMBO WITH YO GIRL... and I'm giving her some Gatorade because it'll quench her thirst but I'm making sure she doesn't spill on my seats because it's new, k

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There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

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What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone!

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Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

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A catholic priest invited one of Sunday school students to his house one night. They watched a movie and the boy was home before his bedtime.

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? cancer.

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live babies

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

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does this look unsure to you?

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What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

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There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. Neither of the muffins say anything because muffins can't talk.

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Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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