A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

I was having sex with my girlfriend the other night and she called me a pedofile. i told her that was a pretty big word for a 9 year old.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He saw and ice cream truck across the street and rode towards it as fast as he could, sadly it was rush hour and he was hit by a speeding ambulance because he forgot to look both ways.

Knock knock, come in.

What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

Guess what? Chicken butt

Situation. A man trying to find meaning in his life. Question. Why are desieses not colorful, and tasty. Answer. Adolf Hitler and his ice cream songs that he sings on sunday mornings during brunches.

Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

What did the rapist say when he spotted the young girl? I am going to rape you!

A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

your matriarchal component is so overweight that her body mass index is over the desired level for her height and age

A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

What do you call a Black Comedian? Funny, You Racist.

no

what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

Kate

A black guy walks in to a bar.

How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?  No Neither has he

come along children

What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...