How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Hypothetical questions are a waste of time and you are not achieving your full potential by reading this during work.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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What did I say when I fell of THEEeEeeeeeeee...

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a wonderful time.

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Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

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How do you make $10,000 in 1 day? I don't know, but I wish I did.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

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why didn't the kid win the talent show? He wasn't talented.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson was a child molester.

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An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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A black man walks into a Subway restaurant, and goes up to the counter. The cashier already knows that he's going to order the chicken, but how does he know? Because the black man is a regular, and orders the same thing every time.

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What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

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The number one killer of daredevil's is the ground.

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Are you well? No, I'm not a well, I'm a person.

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whats straight as a fudge packer kyle grund

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whats worst than reading youtube comments? Panic at the disco

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knock knock whos there .. derp

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What do babies and caterpillars have in common? They're both dead. Except the caterpillar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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