A very busty blond and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender asks with a smile, "What'll be today, pastor?" "Wine. please."

Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

The jets are a good team..

What's the difference between an Asian driver and a Belgian prostitute? Nothing at all: Marie-Edith Yang is proud of her mixed heritage, and earns a decent wage in a relatively clean brothel in the lovely little medieval town of Bruges.

penis

What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

Women's rights

Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Expensive cheese.

What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Nothing, you cannot drive a plane you can only fly it

What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

Q:why was the man on a two seated bycicle by himself? A:his wife had recently died and he wasn't ready to let go

YO momma is so fat she suffers from cardiovascular illnesses.

What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Wabbit Season" Elmer: Bang

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them

Is Carly smart? No.

"What was the hardest thing about that kid getting killed by that bus." "What?" "My dick"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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