Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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A Mexican and a black person both jump off a bridge, who hits the water first? Neither, as all matter falls at the same rate, regardless of weight, size, or ethnicity.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson was a child molester.

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Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

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jgkbk,mn

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why did the man come out of the closet? because the dark scares him and it smelled like moth balls

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What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

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knock knock you may come in

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Women's rights

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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Why did the man break into the bank? Because he was a bank robber

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

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There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

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What did the Muslim do when he was in a big American crowd? He was socializing.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he's dead

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Freedom of Speech

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

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Matt swam through watter. Gaby drowned on dry land.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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