A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

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The government makes a good decision

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Q: Whats worse then being murdered? A: Nothing

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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what is patrick wilson? smart

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Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

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Why did man push another man off of a building? Because he is a homocidal maniac and should be in federal prison

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

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a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

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Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

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Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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Why did the deer hunter shoot a deer? He told his wife he bought a new TV.

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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There once was a genie With a sevenfoot weenie And he went to the lady next door She thought it was a snake So she hit it with a rake And then he murdered the shit out of her.

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What does a blonde's vagina taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage

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what do you call a black priest? holy shit!

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Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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