why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

A three legged dog walks into a saloon. He is quickly removed, as it was an establishment for humans and not for dogs.

Wanna hear a joke? No.

What has 4 eyes, but can't see? 2 blind people.

what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

Chuck Norris is a normal man.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? Answer: A Pilot

So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

A man from florida and a woman from florida go to a restaurant, which isnt very popular.

Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

why are elephants gray? to tell them apart from blueberries.

Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

Why could the woman cook for her family? She didn't have one she was anti-social

-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

What's pink and smells like a red rose? A pink rose.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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