What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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Why did the doctor wear glasses? Because he was a whale.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

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Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights.

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A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bar. Even though he couldn't read the sign, it was still a bar.

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What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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American healthcare.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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here i am sitting here staring at the wall and beside me is a doll, oh no its moving, i hope it doesnt lick tht popsicle, oh no it just licked tht popsicle, oh no oh no

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What does chuck norris do at 4 o clock in the morning ? Sleep

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chuck norris is a little b|tch

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A African man and Hispanic man fall off of a cliff, which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground simultaneously, due to their equal mass and surface area.

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What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

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what did one bum way to the other? we're shit out of luck

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A man is on anti jokes, he is not laughing.

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

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What's better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Wabbit Season" Elmer: Bang

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What's in there? Get outta there...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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