A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

An English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man walk into a bar. I observed this from outside and therefore have no idea as to any of the sequence of events that occurred once they had entered the bar and disappeared from my line of sight.

So, this one time, I was at the grocery store. Man, that was nuts.

Q: how do you spell apple without any letters? A: you can't.

American healthcare.

Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

No joke.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

What do you call a man that is half Chinese and half Irish? Whatever you want, he's deaf so he won't be able to hear you anyway.

What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Nothing, you cannot drive a plane you can only fly it

What part of the cape were you on? Cod.

A black guy, mexican, and asian walk into a bar. They leave soon after because they heard the "one about them"

your mamas so fat when she puts on a belt she has to use a bomarang to get it around her.

I Love Hitler.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has psychotic tendencies.

What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

What do you call a man with a convex isogonal nonprismatic head? Rhombicosidodecahedron head.

Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

The Aristocrats

Yo Mama's so fat, she weighs more than an electron.

What do you get when you cross an octopus with a camel? Nothing, inter-species breeding is impossible.

A man goes into a store to buy some bread, He asks a woman behind the counter for help. She says " We have white, wheat, or rye. What kind would you like?" . To which the man replies, " It does not matter, I rode my bicycle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...