Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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A black man is playing guitar for a white man and a chinese man. After he is finished playing the white man and chinese man compliment him on his nice playing.

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What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

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Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

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What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

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Yo mama so poor... that she possesses substantially less money than the average person working hard in order to accumulate money today.

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Myspace

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three men walk into a bar. they are immediately rushed to urgent care due to blunt force trauma

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

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wat do call a joke thats funny a funny joke

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Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

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what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

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How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

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What's red and silly? A blood clot

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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the cow goes moo

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops