I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

How do you stop a bus? Put the brakes on.

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Just one.

So this guy and his monkey walk into a bar, I forget the rest of the joke but your mothers a whore.

If shes old enough to count..... Then having sex with her would be considered illegal.

What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up

Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

Kate

What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

wat do call a joke thats funny a funny joke

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

Military intelligence.

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

Jess Burns

Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...