How you make a duck cry? Raping it. How you make it shut up? Killing it. Why did no one helped the duck? Because the duck has no friends.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

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Why does six love nine? They both get pleasured

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped after getting raped.

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To whomever it may concern, You are currently reading this anonymous letter from someone anonymous. I’m currently watching you read this letter. I am not a threat. I am not Big Brother. I am someone anonymous. You will never find out who I am. You may have a few ideas of who this might be, but you will be wrong. Just know that I am watching you. That is all. I love you. All for Jesus -A

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Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

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Everyone lies about agreeing to the terms of service... look, I'll do it right now! because i have to click it in order to post the joke.

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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Uncle Eugene enjoyed to drive. Then he was killed in a car crash.

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I hate you.

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what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

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A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

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what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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Why did polly fall of her swing ??? She had no arms

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Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

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Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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