some one knocked on tims door, at the same exact time, someone died in africa

A three legged dog walks into a saloon. He is quickly removed, as it was an establishment for humans and not for dogs.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

I like to eat.

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

What's green and wheels? Your mom.

What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

Why do redheads have red hair Because they were born like that.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

Why don't you have a seat, over there?

Whats white and can't climb trees? A Fridge

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson was a child molester.

A man walks into a bar. Ow!

What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

Where must you go if you have the desire to eat somebody's face? A psychiatric ward. You are clearly going insane and must seek help.

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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