A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

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Oh...okay, good.

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Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

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a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

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How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

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what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

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What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

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The size of Idris Elba's penis

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A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

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A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

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Whats worse then a Republican? 9/11.

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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Potato salad

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

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Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he's dead

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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