Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up

What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

A black guy and a Mexican were in a car. Who was Driving? The police

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? Cancer

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "why the long face?" the man replies with "I have AIDS."

I know animal testing is cruel, but my dog did really well on the SATs.

roses are black violets are gray im color blind

Why did suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Whos there NOT SUZY!

Your mother smells so bad that she scheduled an appointment with her doctor, who prescribed her deodorant soap and chlorophyll and suggested she see a therapist for her chronic self esteem problems.

What do you call a woman with one leg? An amputee

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...