Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is shorter than a toddler? A jewish lifespan.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The jets are a good team..

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A dyslexic man walked into a bar. Even though he couldn't read the sign, it was still a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what is one black person on the moon? Anser: a problem What is all the black peaple on the moon...... a solution.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock Nobody's home.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

An attractive naked woman walks into a bar. Everyone is surprised, and all the straight men, gay women and bi-sexual men and women in the bar are sexually aroused.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A deer walked into a hunter's bar... and was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Global Warming.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: how do you spell apple without any letters? A: you can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops