What is shorter than a toddler? A jewish lifespan.

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What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

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No joke.

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Guy 1 : what you watching? Guy 2 : a documentary on birds Guy 1 : can i watch it with you? Guy 2 : yeah sure go for it.....

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here i am sitting here staring at the wall and beside me is a doll, oh no its moving, i hope it doesnt lick tht popsicle, oh no it just licked tht popsicle, oh no oh no

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Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

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Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because Bob's a fish.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What part of the cape were you on? Cod.

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How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

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In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

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A black guy, mexican, and asian walk into a bar. They leave soon after because they heard the "one about them"

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

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That awkward moment when you thought this joke was going to be good but you thought wrong. Keep looking for good jokes.

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Q:why was the man on a two seated bycicle by himself? A:his wife had recently died and he wasn't ready to let go

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I Love Hitler.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a finger And the middle ones for you

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What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

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Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

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Yo Mama's so fat, she weighs more than an electron.

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What do you get when you cross an octopus with a camel? Nothing, inter-species breeding is impossible.

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A man goes into a store to buy some bread, He asks a woman behind the counter for help. She says " We have white, wheat, or rye. What kind would you like?" . To which the man replies, " It does not matter, I rode my bicycle.

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Religion

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Knock knock, come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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