Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

Q: Why was the blonde so dumb? A: Because she wasn't properly educated.

How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

whats worse than one bee sting... two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings... the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust... three bee stings

why didn't the kid win the talent show? He wasn't talented.

- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

Your mother smells so bad that she scheduled an appointment with her doctor, who prescribed her deodorant soap and chlorophyll and suggested she see a therapist for her chronic self esteem problems.

Women's rights

What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

WHAT DO YOU CALL MEXICANS IN A HOT TUBE BOILED BEANS (; NO RACIAL

What do yo call SQUIRAL!!!!

Why don't chickens where pants? Cause they're animals,duh.

What do babies and caterpillars have in common? They're both dead. Except the caterpillar.

Why did Jill come "tumbling" down the hill after Jack broke his crown? She fell running on a hill, essentially why Jack broke his crown.

A scottish man having fun

A deer walked into a hunter's bar... and was shot.

how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

George W. Bush

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...