An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

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does this look unsure to you?

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Look at your hand. Made you look!

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Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

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What is the difference between a man and a woman? Genitals

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What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Nothing, you cannot drive a plane you can only fly it

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Expensive cheese.

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What does chuck norris do at 4 o clock in the morning ? Sleep

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What did the vegetarian eat for christmas? Food.

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In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

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What's brown and sticky? Brown paint.

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i feel bad for black people (even though u can't consider them people)

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This is a haiku The second line is longest Hippopotamus.

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When is the right time to have sex with a 16 year old? After consent from her parents

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

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What's a rabbit's favourite food? No-one knows, like humans, every rabbit has it's own favourite food.

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Why are african american people better than caucasian people at sports like basketball? Because african american people have more high-twitch muscle fibers. Which allow them to perform Explosion type movements better than caucasian people.

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Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

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Santa Clogged my toliet

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I wish I Charlie Sheen's Dealer.

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Want to hear a joke? Womens rights

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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