Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

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What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

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What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

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Did the chicken cross the road? No because it was in a fenced in area like all farm animals should be

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Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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What's black and white and red all over? A Giant Panda that has been killed by poachers.

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why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other-side

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How many jews died in a gas chamber? None because the holocaust is a myth.

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The AIDS patient was gay

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Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson was a child molester.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

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A man is walking down the street when, on the other side, he see's another man, with what appears to be an orange for a head. Unable to contain his curiosity, he approaches and enquires: "Excuse me, but I couldn't help noticing that you have you have an orange for a head..." "That's right" says the man with an orange for a head. "I met a magical genie one day who granted me three wishes..." "Amazing" says the first man, "Please continue". "Well, for my first wish, I wished I was incredibly rich, and that every day, I woke up in a four-poster bed full of used bank notes, and a statement with twenty zeros". "Did that happen?" askes the first man. "It did indeed", replies the man with an orange for a head. "I'm probably the richest man in the world". "Amazing!" replies the first man. "What did you wish for next?" "For my second wish, I wished to be incredibly attractive to women, and that every day, in my four poster bed full of money, when I awoke, there would be three of the most beautiful, naked women imaginable." "Wow! Did THAT happen?" "Of course! To be honest though, that gets a bit of a bind - walking around is a bit difficult these days, in fact, I'm on my way to pick up some cream." "No way, that's amazing!" says the first man. "What was your third wish?" "Well..." replies the man with an orange for a head, "For my third wish, I wished I had an orange for a head."

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There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a porch? Bob

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Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

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A man farted. Another man walked away.

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What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

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Why are anti jokes funny? You can trick an old person to think they are

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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