So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

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I like to eat.

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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why did the chicken cross the road

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why did the man come out of the closet? because the dark scares him and it smelled like moth balls

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What do you call a black Jew that is also a crippled midget with no family except for an autistic brother? His original name that his mother gave him at birth.

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GRAAAAAAAR.

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Scott

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What did the mother give her family for christmas? Nothing. The family is Jewish.

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Q: What do you call a group of asians riding their bikes while carrying large bags of merchandise filled with an ample amount of video games? A: Obviously, a few enviromentally-friendly entrepreneurs who managed to make enough of a profit via their established buisness to the extent that they could buy what they required and get some other desired items as well.

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What Do You Call A Japanese Man Humming Classicle Music While Removing Toy Soldiors From His Ear With His Foot Jumping Up And Down On A Large Elephant Strutting About The Universe? Strange.

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Knock Knock? WHAT?!?!?

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

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Freedom of Speech

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What's harder than nailing seven dead babies to a tree? My erection while doing it.

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What did the American call the Arab? Nothing the American could not talk because he suffered from throat cancer because of the effects of 9/11 and thus causing his hatred towards Arabs and led to the Arabs death. Green

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Do you think retarded people know that they are retarded? I don't know, you tell me. Wait a second....did you just call me retarded? They are clueless.

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Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

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A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

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An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car!

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How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

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What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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