Eliza eh? Of you I do not know but at least you used the correct code yourself, I suppose Nero7 kept your existence hidden from most of us for a reason. This "point Zero" is no more, about time people got out of the fucking north pole anyways, he was buried there, as his identity and existence is better off kept secret from the outside world for reasons many, none the less because if he is found and identified, undesired company might track whatever loose threads he might have left, straight back to us and we are not exactly operating within the parameters of... Legality anymore. Listen, if you want to know more give me the code straight out (I could not care less about deciphering shit right now and we are leaving horseshit network anyways) And I will tell you what Major6 knows, because as far as the screams roaming these halls can tell, he is still alive, you just better be fast, my men and women are not exactly experts at keeping these people alive... Yet, but enough idle chitchat. If you are who you claim to be, you should have the code I need, bring it, and I will present you with the neccesary information... ...Fail to do so, and I suggest that you never address any of us again fair lady, while we can simply not be tracked down, the security here is... Do I need to say? Neo-Nero.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What's big, black and long? The line in KFC

thumb_up thumb_down -93

You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

thumb_up thumb_down +108

What happened when a fish rode a bike? It fell off and injured itself.

thumb_up thumb_down +108

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down +100

Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

thumb_up thumb_down +42

what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

thumb_up thumb_down +36

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops