A man and his son are in a store, the man says to his son, "That candy bar has your name on it." The son replies, "I wish that you didn't name me Butterfingers." The dad answers, "I wish that you were never born."

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The jets are a good team..

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how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

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Why is this website named Anti Joke because that's what the creator wanted it to be called

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American healthcare.

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Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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No joke.

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Why did the guy throw a clock out of his window? Because he had mental issues.

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How many babies does it take to fill a ditch? Six if you pack them in really tight.

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Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

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YO momma is so fat she suffers from cardiovascular illnesses.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

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What's in there? Get outta there...

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What's the worst part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap. What's the best part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap.

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how did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken..

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chuck norris is a little b|tch

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Q: What is Paul's nickname A: His name is Paul, he doesn't need a nickname

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-What did the gay guy say in Mcdonald's? -Ill have a number 10, with hot sauce and a large coke.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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A man goes into a store to buy some bread, He asks a woman behind the counter for help. She says " We have white, wheat, or rye. What kind would you like?" . To which the man replies, " It does not matter, I rode my bicycle.

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What do you get when you cross an octopus with a camel? Nothing, inter-species breeding is impossible.

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Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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