knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

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France never surrender.

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women's rights

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

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Why was Frankenstein green? Because he painted himself green. Frankenstein is the scientist, not the monster.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was staples to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure

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A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

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What happens in the end of the original "Pinocchio" Italian fairy tale? He is hanged.

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Why does the Easter Bunny deliver chocolate eggs? Because

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

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Three black men go to the basketball courts one day hoping to play some ball. On the way there they see a homeless man with a sign that says "Homeless. Anything will help." However, since they were on there way to play ball, none of them found it necessary to bring cash, thus resulting in them walking by the homeless man without giving him any money.

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and was forced to prostitute for money, thus resulting in you.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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Why did the chicken cross the road? cause' he was annoyed with all the stereotypcial idiots who insist he crosses the road for comical value

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You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

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If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

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son, you're adopted.

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Winking at old people

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What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

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...Jack Vale

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There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops