Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter? Whatever his name is?

I was having sex with my girlfriend the other night and she called me a pedofile. i told her that was a pretty big word for a 9 year old.

P0P T4Rt

why did the black man eat two buckets of fried chicken? because he was hungry and he likes fried chicken

Laws are initially proposed in Parliament as bills. They become Acts after being approved three times by Parliamentary votes and then receiving Royal Assent from the Governor-General. The majority of bills are promulgated by the government of the day (that is, the party or parties that have a majority in Parliament). It is rare for government bills to be defeated, indeed the first to be defeated in the twentieth century was in 1998. It is also possible for individual MPs to promote their own bills, called member's bills; these are usually put forward by opposition parties, or by MPs who wish to deal with a matter that parties do not take positions on.

how many scrubbers does it take to change a lightbulb 2, 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell like urine.

Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

Why did the Polar Bear fall through the ice? The ice was unable to support his mass

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

Women's rights.

Aaron Cummings is me. Find me on facebook:)

The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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