What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

Knock knock! Whose there? ... The person who was knocking suffered a fatal shot to the back of the head by a drive by shooter, if the person at the door had just opened it, instead whose there? (...which no one does anyways...) The knocker may have survived. He had a wife and 5 kids, 3 Grandkids.

how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

roses are red, Violets are blue, i have a gun, Suck my dick

Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

Whats worse then nailing ten babies to a tree? Nailing one dead baby to ten trees.

What's 1+1? 4.

your fat

Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

Why did the koala fall off the tree? Because it was dead.

What's my favorite color?? I don't have one, i'm a joke you idiot.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Chris Hanson with To Catch A Predator.

How you make a duck cry? Raping it. How you make it shut up? Killing it. Why did no one helped the duck? Because the duck has no friends.

Who looks like Zach Efron? Shrek.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

1 + 1 = ? 2 "No" "what have you been smoking?" "Seriously, 1+1= window" "WTF???"

What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

Q. A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car. Who's driving? A. The police officer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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