A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

What did the wannabe mother get for Christmas A miscarriage.

That awkward moment were your giving your girlfriend a blowjob then you realize your giving your girlfriend a blowjob.

How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

ceiling mounted bonerss CC

do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

-Whats worse than a joke with no punch line? -What?...

Three postmodernists walk into a bar. The barman says "What's this, some kind of anti joke?"

What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

Knock knock! Whose there? ... The person who was knocking suffered a fatal shot to the back of the head by a drive by shooter, if the person at the door had just opened it, instead whose there? (...which no one does anyways...) The knocker may have survived. He had a wife and 5 kids, 3 Grandkids.

Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

How do you make a baby cry? You leave it unattended

Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...