Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

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What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

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Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

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Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

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Knock Knock, Come in.

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How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

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Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

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A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

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What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

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What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

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What did the wannabe mother get for Christmas A miscarriage.

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WOMEN'S RIGHTS

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Why are anti jokes funny? You can trick an old person to think they are

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How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

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a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

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ceiling mounted bonerss CC

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do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

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-Whats worse than a joke with no punch line? -What?...

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Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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