knock knock. who's there myfeth myfeth who myfether came off

I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

Q:Which way do gay people walk? A:In One Direction

Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

Three nuns were talking in the church. The first nun said, "I was looking in the Priest's desk and found a condom." The second nun said, "I saw also saw that condom, except I poked holes in it." The third nun promptly reported them to the Priest causing the first two nuns to lose thier jobs.

I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

Aaron Cummings is me. Find me on facebook:)

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

Lacrosse

What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...