What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

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What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

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what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

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What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

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Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

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Why did the kid want money? So he could buy pokemon cards.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was a woman.

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roses are red, Violets are blue, i have a gun, Suck my dick

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

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Why was the girl crying at the dance? Someone shot her.

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What do you call a mummy that falls into the Nile? Wet

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How are Steve Jobs and the iPhone similar? They both keep getting thinner as time goes on.

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what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being raped by a giant scorpion

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Women's Rights...

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Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

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The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

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My life

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What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

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Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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