How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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Like my status for a tbh?

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

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How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

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What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

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-Whats worse than a joke with no punch line? -What?...

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guess what the quarterback did he threw the ball!

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Laura Pratz..

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Why was the girl crying at the dance? Someone shot her.

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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What's wrong with the muffler man? his body.

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Like Harry Potter? Like anti-jokes? Check these out: http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38139-why-did-dumbledore-fall-off-the-astronomy-tower-because-snape-killed-him http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38140-knock-knock-who-s-there-you-know-you-know-who-call-him-voldemort-fear-of-a-name-increases-fear-of-the http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38141-a-black-kid-an-asian-kid-and-a-jewish-kid-walk-into-a-barrier-they-are-students-at-hogwarts-school

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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Why did Madelyn leave the space next ot the computer? Because her hat got tooken from her.

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The Bible

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Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? A mexican is a human being while a bench is an inanimate object.

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Why did the fat black man call the fatter white man. Because they were good friends and liked to talk.

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Women's Rights...

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? One is a mythical person who parents exploit to get their children to behave due to lack of parenting skills.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Never mind, it's just an imaginary door anyway.

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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