I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

how do you make a fat black man cry? Rape his wife.

Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

A baby seal walks into a club...

What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

A couple arrived at Hospital in less than 3 hours. but actually they wanted to go to the Church...and 3 hours is quite a long time...

a man walks into a bar and dies

A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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