Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

Politics.

A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

what happened to the boy who asked for a hit from the bong? he got punched in the face.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

what happens when you wake up inception

How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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