Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Where did John go? Refrigerator

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and proceeded to have gay sex on the floor.

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Why couldn't johnny go home? Someone commited arsen and burned it down.

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What is the siilarity between Justin beiber and pinoccio? they both waant to be real boys

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

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why did the black man drown? he cant swim

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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Two men walk into a bar, the third man ducks.

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Womens Basketball.

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Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

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A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

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Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

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"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

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what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

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Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

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What's worse than going to boot camp? - going to concentration camp.

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a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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