Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

So - this baby seal walked into a club.

I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

A Horse walks into a bar. So the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The Horse replies "My jockey raped me".

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

Hey, you have small hands.

knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

Q:why did the chicken cross the road. A:to get back to the farm he was raised on

What's worse then Obama? Nothing

Knock,Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?

Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

what's black, white, and red all over? any red object

why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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