Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

thumb_up thumb_down +28

three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what happens when you wake up inception

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +8

w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

thumb_up thumb_down +8

knock knock. who's there yourdrive yourdrive who yourdriving me up the wall

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man cries out to god.. and god doesn't answer.

thumb_up thumb_down

A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

thumb_up thumb_down -10

knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

thumb_up thumb_down -66

You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -92

Where did John go? Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -100

Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops