Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

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Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

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Why did the catholic priest go to jail He was a paedophile

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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Do u know what would be a big pain in the ass? A thorn

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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A blond walks into a bar. She orders a drink.

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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my names jim haha

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

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What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

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LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

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Hey hey what did the bald man say to brian moccia? lOL!

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Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

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Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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