I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

Why couldn't the car drive? Because its wheels were made of butter.

Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

what do u call a black person a black person dehh

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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