A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how do you make a fat black man cry? Rape his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo Mamma

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A baby seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Politics.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

thumb_up thumb_down -131

One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +134

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

thumb_up thumb_down +68

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down +58

how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

thumb_up thumb_down +52

A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A couple arrived at Hospital in less than 3 hours. but actually they wanted to go to the Church...and 3 hours is quite a long time...

thumb_up thumb_down +34

a man walks into a bar and dies

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops