A blond walks into a bar. She orders a drink.

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

Why did the baby die? It got shot.

Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

What's worse then finding out that your partner has AIDS? I don't know actually, but finding out would suck pretty bad...

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

Netball.

Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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