Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

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Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

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what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

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One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

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Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

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What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

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how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

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A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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A couple arrived at Hospital in less than 3 hours. but actually they wanted to go to the Church...and 3 hours is quite a long time...

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What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

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A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

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A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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