A blond walks into a bar. She orders a drink.

What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

Why did the baby die? It got shot.

Hey hey what did the bald man say to brian moccia? lOL!

here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

Why do black people love menthol? Nobody knows.

minorities

A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

why did the pile of rocks cross the road? they were stuffed down the chickens throat

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

Two men walk into a bar, the third man ducks.

what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

What did one pole say to the other pole? We are both from poland

Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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