a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

Knock Knock! Come in.

Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

whats worse then getting robbed by a black man? -getting hit by a bus due to not having the needed currency to get a ride home

Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

What is the punchline of this joke? There isn't one.

How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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