How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer, pays, and leaves.

Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

I am the sun. You are the moon.

What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

i have cancer

Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

What did the man do after a bad day at work? He went home and beat his wife

What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

Where did John go? Refrigerator

Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

A chicken and a triceratops walk into a bar. They both immediately recognize each other and start trading anti-jokes, of which no one else in the bar understood, for they are animals, and animals cannot speak. Which brings up the question of how the triceratops and the chicken would communicate in any way that was conversely accurate to how humans would make jokes. Also adding in the fact that they are both from different eras of time, and the people wonder why a triceratops is walking around when they are in fact extinct. Turns out, the triceratops was an animatronic that gained sentience and ran off the set of Jurassic Park IV, a movie production that was not yet announced, as Steven Spielberg was still working on other movies that were more important at the time. The chicken flew in here because he heard the bar was close-by to where he worked, so he decided to drop by after a long Friday. The bartender finally walks up and asks the triceratops, "What would you like?" The triceratops then went on a rampage and killed everyone inside because he was an alcoholic and lost his family because of it, since his ex-wife would be worked to the bone trying to raise his 2 children and adopted platypus son David. He lost everything in the divorce. Why was he in a bar then? I don't know, I can't talk to dinosaurs. The chicken then befriended the triceratops, as the chicken was a secret anarchist who sought to bring down all the stores on the street, as his mother was killed there while trying to cross the street. She fell into a manhole. The chicken and the triceratops then traded usernames on League of Legends then played out that Friday teaming up and taking down Evil. How do they play League if they're animals? Because this whole story is made up and you wasted a good 2-3 minutes trying to read this.

hi im paul!

A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

Womens Basketball.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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