I like my girls like my wisky. Strong, tastes and the leading cause of liver damage.

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w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

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I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

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What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

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whats worse then getting robbed by a black man? -getting hit by a bus due to not having the needed currency to get a ride home

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a nice man.

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I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

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What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

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What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

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"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

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What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

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What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

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why do giraffes have long necks? because their heads are a long way from their bodies

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

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robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops