Q: So why does an Asian guy look at these two black guys and a white woman in the middle? A: Because he wants an oreo cookie.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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where did the black person go poop ? in the toilet!

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

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There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

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Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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A fairly-priced Apple computer.

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Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

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A duck walks up to the lemonade stand. The man running the stand then smiles with a tear in his eye as he is reminded of when he and his now dead parents used to feed the ducks at a nearby lake every Sunday afternoon.

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I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

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Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

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In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock Who's there THE CHICKEN

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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what happened to the boy who asked for a hit from the bong? he got punched in the face.

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What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

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Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

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What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What's better than having an iPad? I don't know, I lost both my hands.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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