A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

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Knock Knock. Peep Hole!!

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What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

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what do u call a black person a black person dehh

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Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

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- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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i have cancer

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What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

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Politics.

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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