how do you make a fat black man cry? Rape his wife.

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What is the loneliest number to exist? Zero. Except it's not lonely. I'm just saying there are zero lonely numbers. Numbers aren't sentient. They can't feel loneliness.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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Knock,Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why did the little girl cry A rabi slapped her and stole her ice cream

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

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( I PLAYED SKRILLESX's SONG ON MAX VOLUME ) My neighbours loved? this so much they invited the police round!

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One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

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knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

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Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

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Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

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A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The customers observing this quickly leave because the bartender is talking to a horse, which does not talk.

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why did the black man drown? he cant swim

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why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops