William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The customers observing this quickly leave because the bartender is talking to a horse, which does not talk.

Sean Nuneviller look him up, he's cute.

My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

why does the octopus have no friends? because they're anti social by nature

a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

A whole family go to a water park. They have a great day.

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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