nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

why do black people were white shirts?..they feel like it

69.... is a number

A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

Guess what? SHADAP

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

Your mom is so fat she has type 2 diabetes.

OMG LOOK I FOUND A MAGIC DECODER RING

What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A manufacturing defect in the chain link fence released several chickens who are now freely roaming the area.

Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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