My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

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A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

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11111

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Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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girls basketball

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Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

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Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

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A black guy gets arrested...

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w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

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What is obama's favorite place to eat? Subway

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What is Mario's favorite food? I don't know. You should ask him.

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What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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And if a chicken had wings it wouldn't bump it's butt when it landed.

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Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

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What did the man do after a bad day at work? He went home and beat his wife

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Why did the little girl cry A rabi slapped her and stole her ice cream

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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what is white and red all over? a ginger

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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