Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

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Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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I'm funny.

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In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

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i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

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Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

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Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

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knock knock. no one's home..

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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yo momma is so ugly, she is unpleasant to look at!

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Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

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Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

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Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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