You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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Nice legs....What time do they open?

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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When did the Chinese guy go to the dentist? At the correct time he had been allotted.

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What's worse then finding out that your partner has AIDS? I don't know actually, but finding out would suck pretty bad...

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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where did the black person go poop ? in the toilet!

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What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

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Animal

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why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

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Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

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i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

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Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

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A black guy gets arrested...

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what do you do if there is a black person in your front yard? tell him to leave...

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Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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What's the number one killer in America? Death.

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Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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