What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

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A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

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A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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hi im paul!

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Whats Red and smells like Blue Paint? Red Paint.

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Yes. A: Thanks.

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Netball.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She's a women.

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a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

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Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

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What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

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What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

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pussy enough said

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

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Why did the catholic priest go to jail He was a paedophile

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Theres 3 guys walking and the see a genie. He says hell grant 3 wishes. The first guy asked for sandals. The genie said"I can do that" and he got sandals. The second guy asked for rock hard abs.The genie said,"sure thing".When he looked down, he saw that he had rock hard abs. The third guy asked for a pair of pants."ok" Said the genie. And then he got a pair of pants.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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