Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

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What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

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Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she dropped out of college.

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LOL -LOL GUY

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What color is a banana? yellow.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

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whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

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-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

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A hayride would be fun.

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Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

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What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

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why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

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girls basketball

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Your mother is so fat.

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Miami Heat.

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your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

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Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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