I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between a duck A chair Vests have no sleeves

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Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

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BUT HWY?

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Miami Heat.

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

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A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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what do you call a gay kid? KIRK, SAV, FRANK, or even KIRKLE THE TURTLE

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

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LOL -LOL GUY

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give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

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What color is a banana? yellow.

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What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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