What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

What do you think about whats happening in the middle east right now? You're an idiot.

Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

There was a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman. All three of three of them walked into a bar. They began a heated debate over the benefits of their healthcare plan, payed the tab on their drink, then proceeded to drive home in their Toyota Prius.

why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

What do you call a black man and woman with a little white girl? A Family.

Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

Your mama's teeth are so yellow, she decided to invest in a teeth whitening procedure and begin a healthier dental hygiene regimen.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

What's a rabbit's favourite food? No-one knows, like humans, every rabbit has it's own favourite food.

What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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