There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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What do you call a muslim with an RPG? Holy Shiite

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i have cancer

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

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Who's fat? Holly Davis.

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What did it say in the end of the book? The End.

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God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! That is a joke which very few people would find even mildly entertaining.

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

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I like turtoes.

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Hi Adam,

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Libraries.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because they're humans and many humans enjoy the savory taste of fried chicken.

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Asian NASCAR.

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In Soviet Russia its very cold

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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2+2= 478

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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