Yo mamma's so stupid, she dropped out of college.

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Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

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What do you call a black man without a job? Unemployed.

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How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

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what has legs but can't walk? a paraplegic

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What do you call a three legged man? Horribly deformed

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so a baby seal walks into a club...

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

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Asian NASCAR.

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Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

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What's the difference between a duck?

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A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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