What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

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what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

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Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but hears my number so call me maby .....7 days

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! That is a joke which very few people would find even mildly entertaining.

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

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Libraries.

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What do homosexual men do during sex? I don't know, but if you want to, I suggest you ask one of them.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

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whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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Asian NASCAR.

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How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

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Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops