A baby seal walks into a club.

why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

if i'm white and you're white, then who took my car keys?

Reduce, reuse, recycle Anti-joke.com

Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Cancer.

What did the police officer say to the boy in the park? your parents were killed in a car accident.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

you know what they say... hydrate or die

Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

What's the difference between a black man and cake? I like cake.

what has legs but can't walk? a paraplegic

hey i just met you and this is crazy but hears my number so call me maby .....7 days

What did the kid see when he fell down the well? Nothing it was to dark.

Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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