how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

The economy.

why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

A duck walks up to the lemonade stand. The man running the stand then smiles with a tear in his eye as he is reminded of when he and his now dead parents used to feed the ducks at a nearby lake every Sunday afternoon.

What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Why was the mexican dead? Because he overdosed on Methamphetamine.

What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

What do you call a small weapon used by northern russians? A Gun.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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