My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

thumb_up thumb_down -1

knock knock. no one's home..

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's better than having an iPad? I don't know, I lost both my hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the armless girl fell off the swing? Because somebody pushed her. Why did se fell again? Because somebody pushed her again.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a black man and cake? I like cake.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

thumb_up thumb_down -11

anti-joke teehee

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the kid see when he fell down the well? Nothing it was to dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A young christian boy walks into a church and gets raped

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A cannibal wearing a sport coat, grey slacks, and a pink tie walks into a bar holding a duck in one hand, a chicken in the other, and chewing on a human arm. He is subsequently shot by one of the patrons. There's a concealed weapons law here.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

thumb_up thumb_down -33

thumbs up!

thumb_up thumb_down -67

A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

thumb_up thumb_down -129

your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +48

A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

equality for women

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the girl. Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He has cerebral palsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops