What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Question 1 - What is 1 + 1 = Hospital

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a human being of Aztec descent, while a bench is an inanimate object used most frequently as a place to sit.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

thumbs up!

thumb_up thumb_down -61

A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

thumb_up thumb_down -71

What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

2+2= 478

thumb_up thumb_down +36

clamidia

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

thumb_up thumb_down +18

96

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the number one killer in America? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops