Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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What's bad for your teeth? A brick

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A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

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What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

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What do you call a three legged man? Horribly deformed

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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Knock knock. Whose there. Uninterupting black lady. Uninter.... MMMMMMMHHHHMMMM. Black ladies never listen

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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knock knock whos there? your mother your mother who? ...........what?

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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The NBA lockout

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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