what do you do if there is a black person in your front yard? tell him to leave...

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I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

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What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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A young christian boy walks into a church and gets raped

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What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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A Jewish man joins the German Army. He serves with distinction during the First World War, receives several commendations for bravery, and is one of the 12 million people killed during the Holocaust.

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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What did the Nazi call the Jew? Alex.

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You're mama's so fat: she has to wear plus size clothing

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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