What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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A Jewish man joins the German Army. He serves with distinction during the First World War, receives several commendations for bravery, and is one of the 12 million people killed during the Holocaust.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

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Whats green and tasty? Snot

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What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

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whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

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Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

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Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

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What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

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How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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What did the Nazi call the Jew? Alex.

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Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

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What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

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What's bad for your teeth? A brick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops