Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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The NBA lockout

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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Obama 2012

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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You might be redneck if you are... Indian

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Q. What's funnier than an anti-joke? A. Thousands of anti-jokes, compiled on a worldwide network.

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What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

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What did the Nazi call the Jew? Alex.

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Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

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Q: Why'd the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the other side

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A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's bad for your teeth? A brick

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How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

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What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

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If you live in the 'living' room, what do you do in the others? You die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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