How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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You might be redneck if you are... Indian

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

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Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

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What's bad for your teeth? A brick

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? Nope... Neither has he

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! That is a joke which very few people would find even mildly entertaining.

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A cannibal wearing a sport coat, grey slacks, and a pink tie walks into a bar holding a duck in one hand, a chicken in the other, and chewing on a human arm. He is subsequently shot by one of the patrons. There's a concealed weapons law here.

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Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

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How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

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How do you evolve a Pikachu into a Raichu? You use a Thunderstone.

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Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

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Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

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Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

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What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

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What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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