what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

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What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

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What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

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Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

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You might be redneck if you are... Indian

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Q. What's funnier than an anti-joke? A. Thousands of anti-jokes, compiled on a worldwide network.

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but hears my number so call me maby .....7 days

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Women deserve equal rights... April fools.

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How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

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Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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