Why do black people always say to the left to the left... because they don't have rights.

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What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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so a baby seal walks into a club...

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

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Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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Itookasipasoda

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why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

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What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

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What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

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Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

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What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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