A baby seal walks into a club.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

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Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

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What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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What did the Pikachu say to the Charmander? Pika pika pikachu pika!

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

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who farted i did :]

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Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

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Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

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So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

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equality for women

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

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Q. What's funnier than an anti-joke? A. Thousands of anti-jokes, compiled on a worldwide network.

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What did the Nazi call the Jew? Alex.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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