knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

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A duck walks up to the lemonade stand. The man running the stand then smiles with a tear in his eye as he is reminded of when he and his now dead parents used to feed the ducks at a nearby lake every Sunday afternoon.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

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Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

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How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

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How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

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What's the difference between a black man and cake? I like cake.

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LOL -LOL GUY

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

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What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

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Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

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Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was dead and therefore unable to escape the Chick fil A bag it was being carried in.

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Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

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What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops