What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

knock knock whos there? your mother your mother who? ...........what?

Your momma's so fat...

Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

Chikin nuggets

A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

Two cannibals are eating around a fire in the jungle, and one turns to the other and says "Does this taste funny to you?" Oh yeah, and they're eating a clown.

What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

Knock Knock! Come in.

Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

why is billy g is really supid because he gets bad grades

Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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