Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

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A hayride would be fun.

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Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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Arrow to the Knee

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What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

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You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

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Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

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Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What's yellow and has six legs ? A cat. I may be wrong about the color and the legs, I'm color-blind and I can't count.

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Miami Heat.

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What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

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how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

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Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

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You're mama's so fat: she has to wear plus size clothing

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

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Who's more mean than teacher Hitler

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

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Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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