how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

thumb_up thumb_down +32

teacher: what comes after 69? johnny: mouthwash teacher: get out.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call ten black men running down the street? A race.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats the difference between a circle and a peace sign? Three lines!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? -I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

hi hi strager danger

thumb_up thumb_down -80

Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

thumb_up thumb_down +71

What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A: Knock knock! B: A: Guess no one's home.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Caitlyn.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happens if someones forgets to put the 'anti' next to 'joke.' It is taken by someone else and created into an anti Joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A white man and a black man are standing on the edge of a 20 story building. The view from up there is rather nice.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Eating chicken off a baby's ass

thumb_up thumb_down -75

Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

thumb_up thumb_down -79

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops