Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

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What did the rock say to the other rock? It didnt

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Why couldn't the dog fetch? It's back legs were useless after it got run over.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Lean a ladder against the tree and reassure them if they are apprehensive.

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Whats the difference between a chicken? One of its legs are both the same.

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Knock, Knock Who is there? Yo Yo who? *the man ran away and was never seen again, because he had nowhere to stay*

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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whats forever alone me

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

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smug face >:}

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Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

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Invisible Television.

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How do you see a black man in the dark? You dont

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Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

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Whats pink and looked like an angry bulldog? Your moms vagina last night

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

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What's black without keys. A keyboard after you hit it with a shovel.

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Why did the black man run from the officer? The officer was trying to rape him.

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my bubbles!

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What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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The pig walks up to the buture the' The buture sloters him!

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It's black, and when it falls out of a tree, your refrigurator is broken. Your refrigurator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops