Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

vn[oiaehsobv[khpogjglprljffknfsiphgeknkldfekageriyreojgyperogerpojregkeporg? cuase u stupid and this stupid joke is to

What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

Why did the priest touch the little boy? To Baptise him.

LIKE THIS!

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Knock knock? Whos there? the Chicken.

What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

A 55-year-old white man's car is broken, so he decides to take a bus to work that morning. His bus arrives and he gets on. Then he notices the driver's a woman. He pays for his ticket, takes a seat by the window and in about an hour he gets to his office.

What did the cop say to the robber? You have the right to remain silent

Whats the difference between a circle and a peace sign? Three lines!

What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

hi.... bonjour... hola... DOOO YOUUUU UNDERSTANDDD MEEE !!!!!!!!!!!

When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

my bubbles!

Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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