What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

YO MOMMA SO FAT... that it is really beginning to be an issue.

What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

a black guy walks into a bar and the bartender says "get out of here, whites only" this joke takes place in the 1950's when african americans were discriminated against

Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

What's worse than dying? Living in Africa

hi hi strager danger

How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

LIKE THIS!

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

Q: What did the diddler say to the little boy? A: Can i touch you inappropriately?

What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

Whats the difference between a circle and a peace sign? Three lines!

Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

my bubbles!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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