- Anti Joke

Q:Why did the leaf fall out of the tree? A:Because the earths mass causes a pull force towards it at 9.81 meters/second which is called gravity. Gravity was discovered by Sir Issac Newton who was born on December 25, 1642 and passed on March 7, 1727.Newton's work has been said "to distinctly advance every branch of mathematics then studied. His work on the subject usually referred to as fluxions or calculus is seen, for example, in a manuscript of October 1666, now published among Newton's mathematical papers. A related subject was infinite series. Newton's manuscript "De analysi per aequationes numero terminorum infinitas" ("On analysis by equations infinite in number of terms") was sent by Isaac Barrow to John Collins in June 1669: in August 1669 Barrow identified its author to Collins as "Mr Newton, a fellow of our College, and very young ... but of an extraordinary genius and proficiency in these things". Newton later became involved in a dispute with Leibniz over priority in the development of infinitesimal calculus. Most modern historians believe that Newton and Leibniz developed infinitesimal calculus independently, although with very different notations. Occasionally it has been suggested that Newton published almost nothing about it until 1693, and did not give a full account until 1704, while Leibniz began publishing a full account of his methods in 1684. (Leibniz's notation and "differential Method", nowadays recognised as much more convenient notations, were adopted by continental European mathematicians, and after 1820 or so, also by British mathematicians.) Such a suggestion, however, fails to notice the content of calculus which critics of Newton's time and modern times have pointed out in Book 1 of Newton's Principia itself (published 1687) and in its forerunner manuscripts, such as De motu corporum in gyrum ("On the motion of bodies in orbit"), of 1684. The Principia is not written in the language of calculus either as we know it or as Newton's (later) 'dot' notation would write it. But his work extensively uses an infinitesimal calculus in geometric form, based on limiting values of the ratios of vanishing small quantities: in the Principia itself Newton gave demonstration of this under the name of 'the method of first and last ratios' and explained why he put his expositions in this form, remarking also that 'hereby the same thing is performed as by the method of indivisibles'. Because of this, the Principia has been called "a book dense with the theory and application of the infinitesimal calculus" in modern times and "lequel est presque tout de ce calcul" ('nearly all of it is of this calculus') in Newton's time. His use of methods involving "one or more orders of the infinitesimally small" is present in his De motu corporum in gyrum of 1684 and in his papers on motion "during the two decades preceding 1684". Newton had been reluctant to publish his calculus because he feared controversy and criticism. He had a very close relationship with Swiss mathematician Nicolas Fatio de Duillier, who from the beginning was impressed by Newton's gravitational theory. In 1691, Duillier planned to prepare a new version of Newton's Principia, but never finished it. However, in 1693 the relationship between the two men changed. At the time, Duillier had also exchanged several letters with Leibniz. Starting in 1699, other members of the Royal Society (of which Newton was a member) accused Leibniz of plagiarism, and the dispute broke out in full force in 1711. The Royal Society proclaimed in a study that it was Newton who was the true discoverer and labelled Leibniz a fraud. This study was cast into doubt when it was later found that Newton himself wrote the study's concluding remarks on Leibniz. Thus began the bitter controversy which marred the lives of both Newton and Leibniz until the latter's death in 1716.

Why can't black people swim? Because most African American individuals grow up in inner urban cities where they have little or no access to swimming facilities.

this site is funny.

japan4.

what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

What did the rock say to the other rock? It didnt

A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

Robin, get in the Bat-mobile!

Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

What's worse than Hell? The Holocaust.

Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

A married man takes the ring off his finger.

Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "How'd you open the door?"

What do you call a horse with no eyes? A horse with no eyes.

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

What did the chicken say to the rhino? Nothing. Animals can't talk.

whats worse than 10 babies in a mail box 1 baby in 10 mail boxes

i did not type this on 12/23/11 at 8:49:47

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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