What do you do when you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize.

knock knock who's there? Kallie Kallie who? sorry, wrong house

What's the difference between a black guy and a door? Various answers are acceptable. The door has hinges, a black guy has legs, etc.

An irishman walks out of a pub

Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

japan4.

why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

What's worse than Hell? The Holocaust.

So there are two elephants in a bathtub. Elephant 1: "yo can you pass the shampoo" Elephant 2: "radio!"

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

what did one farmer say to the other farmer we are farmers

How are a bucket and a purple shovel alike? Coincidentally they both are registered sex offenders.

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It didn't, a cookie is a food, therefore it doesn't have working organs.

Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

what does a blue watermelon and a cactus that looks like a penis have in common? orange ya glad i didn't say banana!

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

Eating chicken off a baby's ass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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