how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

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Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

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Womens rights

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I told a woman to make me at turkey sandwich. Of course she complied seeing as I was at Subway.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

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Hey i just met you & this is crazy but Nia and Goober Made a baby

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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How was copper wire invented? Probably some scientist did that

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Knock Know Who's there Interrupting ghost Interu--BOO!!! Ha HA!

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Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

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I am not under the alkafluence of inkahlol. The drunker I am, the longer I get.

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What did the chicken say to the rhino? Nothing. Animals can't talk.

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they're already smart enough to achieve interplanetary space travel.

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who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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What did the japonese man say? Nothing that we can understand.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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