Why did the bear stick his head in the honey comb? He wanted honey.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

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Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

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A man walks into a bar, he is immediately rushed to the emergency room

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What do you call a black man and a white woman who are married? A married couple

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LIKE THIS!

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner immediately seeks out the owner of the misplaced obstruction and asks them to remove it promptly less his animal suffers any more untoward damage

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how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

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Why was the boy embarassed at school? He got a noticable boner during class.

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Wanna here a joke? Womens rights

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A French, an American and a Belgian are going together on holidays. I hope they'll have good weather.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It didn't, a cookie is a food, therefore it doesn't have working organs.

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Guy: If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I would put I and u together. Girl: Really because if I could r-arrange the Alphabet I would put f and u together

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i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

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Why was the baby smoking? He was locked in a hot car.

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Why are black people more athletic than whites? Black people originate from Africa, where they lived in a world where athletic ability created natural selection. The most athletic were able to escape dangers of the jungle such as dangerous animals, and were also most apt to find food to survive. Then when the slave trade occured, only the strongest and best fit survived the trip to America and the hard labor. Also, given the socio-economic trends of the United States, African Americans are more likely to grow up in an environment where they have limited opportunity to make a living, besides professional sports, so they play cheap sports like basketball.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

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A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

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Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

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What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops