Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

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Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

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How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, but she had a very muscular vagina.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others don't.

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How are a bucket and a purple shovel alike? Coincidentally they both are registered sex offenders.

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A Jew and a Nazi have dinner together...... they both immensely enjoyed the wine.

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Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

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Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

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am i invited to party? no

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Why's the sun red? It's not it's orange.........retard

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what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

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how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

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So three Mexicans, a black man, and 2 white men enter a room. They promptly sever their penises and jump out the window because they are all members of a strange cult.

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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