why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

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Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

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Q. Why did the friend say to the other friend "Your soo gay!" A. Because he was gay..

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Cole is "good" at soccer

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Rich people gave money to charity Charity gave money to the homeless The homeless spent the money on drugs

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A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

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Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

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Why was the baby smoking? He was locked in a hot car.

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You wanna hear an inside joke? That was one of them.

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a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

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What happen to the ginger after he posted a joke? He was put in jail for 6 months, and analy raped in prision!

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GIVE

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where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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So there are two elephants in a bathtub. Elephant 1: "yo can you pass the shampoo" Elephant 2: "radio!"

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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hi, im sober.

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What do you call two men riding a bicycle.

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Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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