how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

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a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

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Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

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All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

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A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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What did zero say to ten? I see you found someone

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How did the black guy cross the street? He jumped it.

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Dylan Eichas

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

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A 55-year-old white man's car is broken, so he decides to take a bus to work that morning. His bus arrives and he gets on. Then he notices the driver's a woman. He pays for his ticket, takes a seat by the window and in about an hour he gets to his office.

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Knock Knock. "Who's there?" The cops.

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A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Why don't cannibals eat clowns? Clowns do not populate the area in which cannibals reside

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with Nickelodon? You get Dora because she is allways telling you what to do.

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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Lean a ladder against the tree and reassure them if they are apprehensive.

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How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

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A white man and a black man are standing on the edge of a 20 story building. The view from up there is rather nice.

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How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

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Why did Nicholas Cage cross the street? To steal the Declaration of Independence.

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Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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