What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

knock knock who's there? Kallie Kallie who? sorry, wrong house

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

Why couldn't the Hispanic guy become a firefighter? Because the fire chief was racist.

What's the difference between a black guy and a door? Various answers are acceptable. The door has hinges, a black guy has legs, etc.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It didn't, a cookie is a food, therefore it doesn't have working organs.

Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

haha ur single hahahahahhahahahhahaahahhaahaha i am 2

Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

What did the japonese man say? Nothing that we can understand.

Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

How was copper wire invented? Probably some scientist did that

OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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