Why couldn't the Hispanic guy become a firefighter? Because the fire chief was racist.

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ey can i pick your scabs plzz

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

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An irishman walks out of a pub

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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Whats pink and looked like an angry bulldog? Your moms vagina last night

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others don't.

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How are a bucket and a purple shovel alike? Coincidentally they both are registered sex offenders.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It didn't, a cookie is a food, therefore it doesn't have working organs.

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am i invited to party? no

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A fat man takes a crap, it looked like something a rhino would curl out.

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Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

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What did zero say to ten? I see you found someone

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Knock knock? Whos there? the Chicken.

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What's the difference between shoes and a ginger? Shoes do the kicking.

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How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, but she had a very muscular vagina.

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A Jew and a Nazi have dinner together...... they both immensely enjoyed the wine.

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I told a woman to make me at turkey sandwich. Of course she complied seeing as I was at Subway.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

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If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

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So three Mexicans, a black man, and 2 white men enter a room. They promptly sever their penises and jump out the window because they are all members of a strange cult.

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops