whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

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Hey buddy what's up? I justed wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tonight. Just call me and tell me what you wanna do. Ok that's it see ya. Oh yeah! I gave your mom an STD...sorry dude...it just happened. I hope your dad isn't mad. Again, really sorry. Ok bye.

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what does a blue watermelon and a cactus that looks like a penis have in common? orange ya glad i didn't say banana!

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YO MOMMA SO FAT... that it is really beginning to be an issue.

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why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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Hey i just met you & this is crazy but Nia and Goober Made a baby

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What did the japonese man say? Nothing that we can understand.

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hi hi strager danger

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Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

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knock knock who's there? Kallie Kallie who? sorry, wrong house

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poop.

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what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

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Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

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4 on three... 1, 2, 3, 4!

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Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

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What did the chicken say to the rhino? Nothing. Animals can't talk.

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Knock Knock. "Who's there?" The cops.

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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Why did girl cry? Because she recently saw the messy demise of her parent's marriage.

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If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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