how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

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If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

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Hey buddy what's up? I justed wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tonight. Just call me and tell me what you wanna do. Ok that's it see ya. Oh yeah! I gave your mom an STD...sorry dude...it just happened. I hope your dad isn't mad. Again, really sorry. Ok bye.

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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What do you call it when a homosexual from spain is forced to have sex with a 400 pound black man? Rape

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Person A: Hey! Whats up? Person B: Suicide rates...

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knock knock who's there? Kallie Kallie who? sorry, wrong house

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what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? This isn't a car

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What do you call two men riding a bicycle.

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What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

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What did zero say to ten? I see you found someone

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

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When life gets you down, make a comforter.

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4 on three... 1, 2, 3, 4!

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Hey, I just met you and i am crazy, but? here's my room key let's make a baby.

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Ted Haggard.

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A Jew and a Nazi have dinner together...... they both immensely enjoyed the wine.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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I got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen.

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they're already smart enough to achieve interplanetary space travel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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