Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

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How was copper wire invented? Probably some scientist did that

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

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LIKE THIS!

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Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

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A man walks into a store and asks for a loaf of bread.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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I told a woman to make me at turkey sandwich. Of course she complied seeing as I was at Subway.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

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''Wanna hear a joke?'' ''Sure'' ''a joke''

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with Nickelodon? You get Dora because she is allways telling you what to do.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

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why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

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what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

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Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

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GIVE

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You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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An irishman walks out of a pub

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Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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