Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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Always bring food to the zoo. It's not the animals who placed the signs not to feed them.

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Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

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You wanna hear an inside joke? That was one of them.

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What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The owner of the horse then explains the evolution of the species and genetics. The bartender, satisfied, serves the owner a drink and gladly gives the horse water.

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-Is Michael Jackson dead? - HELL YEAH HE'S DEAD!!

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I once looked at a hedge that had the same colour leaves as all of the other hedges in that particular area.

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Whats the difference between and anti joke and a joke? There two different things.

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

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why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? -I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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Eating chicken off a baby's ass

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your moms fat. she's ugly too.

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Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

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Invisible Television.

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how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

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Why wouldn't the girl clean her room? She was paralyzed.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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whats worse than 10 babies in a mail box 1 baby in 10 mail boxes

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read down and see what it is like BEFOR MARRIAGE boy:at last.i can hardly wait! girl:do you want to leave me? boy:NO! dont even think about it! girl:do you love me? boy:ofcourse! always girl:have you ever cheated on me? boy:NO! why are you even asking? girl:will you kiss me ? boy:every chance i get! girl:will you hit me ? boy:hell no! are you crazy ? girl:can i trust you? boy:yes! girl:darling!! read up again and see what it is like AFTER MARRIAGE (L.W)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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