What happened to the blind man who went skydiving? Nothing but the dog was unlucky.The dog kept squirming and he thought he hadnt gone down the cliff yet and said "ok fine dont come with me!".The dog didnt survive. :'(

why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

Eating chicken off a baby's ass

How do you divide 2574 by 23.5 WIth a calculator

Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

A horse walks into a bar. The owner immediately seeks out the owner of the misplaced obstruction and asks them to remove it promptly less his animal suffers any more untoward damage

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

Why wouldn't the girl clean her room? She was paralyzed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because him and his girlfriend were in a bad relationship and he needed to get away for a while.

whats worse than 10 babies in a mail box 1 baby in 10 mail boxes

What's the difference between shoes and a ginger? Shoes do the kicking.

A doctor walks into a room after a woman has just given birth to her baby Doctor: I've got some good news and some bad news Mom: Whats the bad news? Doctor: Your Baby is Ginger. Mom: So what's the good news? Doctor: It's dead.

What's worst than getting glass stuck in your foot? Rubbing lotion on a fork.

What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

What came first?....the woman or the sandwich

Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

You know whats funny? Things that aren't listed here.

when i walk in the living room this is what i see... Luci's big eyes are stairing at me! (Luci is a dog) (Pita is a cat) I start a hissing and a scratchin and i ain't affrid to bite her, bite her, bite her, I"M PITA AND I KNOW IT!!!

How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

Why did the black man fall off the bicycle? He was shot at close range by one of a gang of young white males. This horrific violence was most likely fueled by racial prejudice. Our thoughts go out to the young man's family and friends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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