Eating chicken off a baby's ass

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The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

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How do you divide 2574 by 23.5 WIth a calculator

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Invisible Television.

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner immediately seeks out the owner of the misplaced obstruction and asks them to remove it promptly less his animal suffers any more untoward damage

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how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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Why did the postal worker go to work? Because he has to support his family so they do not starve like his dog.

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Why wouldn't the girl clean her room? She was paralyzed.

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whats worse than 10 babies in a mail box 1 baby in 10 mail boxes

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Why did Dumbledore fall off the astronomy tower? Because Snape killed him.

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What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

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Always bring food to the zoo. It's not the animals who placed the signs not to feed them.

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Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

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Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

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How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

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You wanna hear an inside joke? That was one of them.

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What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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go stand in a mirror look at your face that is the joke. 8- now go tell someone you will tell them a joke and do that to them this will be a fast spreading joke. jkjk this joke is so bad everybody give this alot of bad thums. ha ha i do not care

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

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Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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