A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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my bubbles!

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How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

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how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

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What do you call a guy who has sex with kids? A child molester

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Robin, get in the Bat-mobile!

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What do you call it when a homosexual from spain is forced to have sex with a 400 pound black man? Rape

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your moms fat. she's ugly too.

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You know whats funny? Things that aren't listed here.

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What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

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Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

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when i walk in the living room this is what i see... Luci's big eyes are stairing at me! (Luci is a dog) (Pita is a cat) I start a hissing and a scratchin and i ain't affrid to bite her, bite her, bite her, I"M PITA AND I KNOW IT!!!

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner immediately seeks out the owner of the misplaced obstruction and asks them to remove it promptly less his animal suffers any more untoward damage

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Why wouldn't the girl clean her room? She was paralyzed.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

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What's the difference between shoes and a ginger? Shoes do the kicking.

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Caitlyn.

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Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

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What did the rock say to the other rock? It didnt

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Hey buddy what's up? I justed wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tonight. Just call me and tell me what you wanna do. Ok that's it see ya. Oh yeah! I gave your mom an STD...sorry dude...it just happened. I hope your dad isn't mad. Again, really sorry. Ok bye.

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What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

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If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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