What's 8 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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There once was a man named Joe. Joe had AIDS, and killed all his friends and family The End, now go back to bed, pussy

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How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

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Always bring food to the zoo. It's not the animals who placed the signs not to feed them.

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Why don't cannibals eat clowns? Clowns do not populate the area in which cannibals reside

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Q. What is worse than being British???? A. Not being British

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why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

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Eating chicken off a baby's ass

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if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

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Rose is Red Violet Blew Mustard is in Clue … What about Moni-… ahhh my eye!

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where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

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What's worse than Hell? The Holocaust.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

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hi, im sober.

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

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Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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