what did one farmer say to the other farmer we are farmers

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did the child go to school? Because he wants to succeed in life

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the Black man drown? Because he could not and did not know how to swim. Because he could not afford the lessons to learn how to swim. Because he does not have the financial means to afford a lesson in swimming. Because he is of a low socio-economic level.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

So a man is shopping on black Friday...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

lol this is the best joke ever!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Trees are brown.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man walks in to a bar. He was hospitalized and died later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down +88

A guy and a girl had sex, it was casual.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Q: What comes after 8? A: 9

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's 8 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber and One Direction? A bunch of gay pop stars.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worst than getting glass stuck in your foot? Rubbing lotion on a fork.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A duck, a mailman, and a poet were contemplating suicide, then they changed their minds.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Person A: Hey! Whats up? Person B: Suicide rates...

thumb_up thumb_down -96

Q:How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A:Just Juan.

thumb_up thumb_down +117

Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

thumb_up thumb_down +73

How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

thumb_up thumb_down +57

All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

LIKE THIS!

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops