Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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lets see how many dislikes i can get from this...

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Rose is Red Violet Blew Mustard is in Clue … What about Moni-… ahhh my eye!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

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What do you call a Mexican jumping fences? A really good athlete.

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A married man takes the ring off his finger.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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How do you see a black man in the dark? You dont

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

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How did the black guy cross the street? He jumped it.

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

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Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Knock Knock. "Who's there?" The cops.

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Why did Dumbledore fall off the astronomy tower? Because Snape killed him.

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Why don't cannibals eat clowns? Clowns do not populate the area in which cannibals reside

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Hey buddy what's up? I justed wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tonight. Just call me and tell me what you wanna do. Ok that's it see ya. Oh yeah! I gave your mom an STD...sorry dude...it just happened. I hope your dad isn't mad. Again, really sorry. Ok bye.

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Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

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A white man and a black man are standing on the edge of a 20 story building. The view from up there is rather nice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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