Whut r bacer dew? Eh muphin

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

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What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

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What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

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Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

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Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

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Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

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What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

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poop.

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What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

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What did the school bully get for his birthday? Beaten by his alcoholic father. Children are a product of their environment and his father's abusive nature towards his son forced the young boy to act out in class giving him the reputation of a bully.

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin boys? Thomas and David after his father and grandfather.

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner immediately seeks out the owner of the misplaced obstruction and asks them to remove it promptly less his animal suffers any more untoward damage

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What's black without keys. A keyboard after you hit it with a shovel.

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When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sludge hammer, the other is a watermelon

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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Eating chicken off a baby's ass

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You know whats funny? Things that aren't listed here.

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whats annoying and black? black people

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Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops