A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

Emo Girl: Whats Your Favorite song? Regulor Girl: Something Carrie Underwood sing!(: Emo Girl: Are you retarted? Regulor Girl: Well im not the one who loves Emos .-. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Honstley, I didnt right this my cousin told me to wriget this... i think its stupied... And Yes, Ima Emo but im not trying to judge people if there emo or not! :D Luv ya! -Angel- <3

What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

go stand in a mirror look at your face that is the joke. 8- now go tell someone you will tell them a joke and do that to them this will be a fast spreading joke. jkjk this joke is so bad everybody give this alot of bad thums. ha ha i do not care

Where do you put a black jew? In the back of the.... oh wait i have never seen a black jew before.

whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

How do you divide 2574 by 23.5 WIth a calculator

Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

17

What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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