Whats worse than a dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? Two dead babies. Whats worse then that 5 dead babies and worse then that? Im starting to have suspicions of you being a mass murdurer of small children.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

hi, im sober.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Cole is "good" at soccer

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because him and his girlfriend were in a bad relationship and he needed to get away for a while.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ow, that really hurt."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why mommy upset cause wet and sticky make mommy upset

thumb_up thumb_down

What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

oliver is gay. so much so that he has hex with other men and dosent mind it very much

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

thumb_up thumb_down -106

Yo mama's so fat that I make Yo Mama jokes about her!!

thumb_up thumb_down +165

Never mail in your wishes to a genie, he may be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +129

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops