What did the guy who had cancer get for Christmas? Death.

How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

Women's rights.

Isn't it funny that we think it's totally normal for females to not have penises but for literally EVERY OTHER group of people, it's weird and not ok double standard?

a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

read down and see what it is like BEFOR MARRIAGE boy:at last.i can hardly wait! girl:do you want to leave me? boy:NO! dont even think about it! girl:do you love me? boy:ofcourse! always girl:have you ever cheated on me? boy:NO! why are you even asking? girl:will you kiss me ? boy:every chance i get! girl:will you hit me ? boy:hell no! are you crazy ? girl:can i trust you? boy:yes! girl:darling!! read up again and see what it is like AFTER MARRIAGE (L.W)

A child in Africa developed Malaria. He became very sick and died.

Lol, listen, the suggestion lies in the "not not", you are using not twice in your mind, which under trance makes it so your subconcious registers that you are using a double negative while you consciously do not. Look back at the messages and register consciously that you and I have been using "not not" twice during the past messages, when the net shuts down here, you reinforce the "I will totally notnot, tell him" so the suggestion just gets stronger.

A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

Knock Knock Who's there? Can people stop posting grammatically incorrect jokes on here. Half of the sentences do not make sense.

Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

YO MOMMA SO FAT... that it is really beginning to be an issue.

whats forever alone me

What the difference between a black man and a pizza? A black man is capable of feeding a family. A pizza is capable of feeding an American.

What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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