Why did Dumbledore fall off the astronomy tower? Because Snape killed him.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

What's worse than finding ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

What do you get when you cross a blonde with Nickelodon? You get Dora because she is allways telling you what to do.

how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

Q. What is worse than being British???? A. Not being British

Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

Whats worse than a dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? Two dead babies. Whats worse then that 5 dead babies and worse then that? Im starting to have suspicions of you being a mass murdurer of small children.

Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

Why did the girl pee her pants? She was only 1 month old...

A priest and a rabbi are playing golf one weekend. The priest tees off first. When the rabbi steps up to tee off, it begins to rain heavily. Dismayed, the rabbi says, "I thought it there was only a 10% chance of rain today."

Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

Why couldn't the dog fetch? It's back legs were useless after it got run over.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because he did

A women go hit by a car, what everyone woners though, how did the car get in between the bedroom and the kitchen?

What came first?....the woman or the sandwich

whats worse than having cancer? nothing you have cancer and should proceed to see doctor

Never mail in your wishes to a genie, he may be dyslexic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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