why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding your babies head in a microwave

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A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

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Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

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Why couldn't the Hispanic guy become a firefighter? Because the fire chief was racist.

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Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because he did

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Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

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One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

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Why did Nicholas Cage cross the street? To steal the Declaration of Independence.

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I once looked at a hedge that had the same colour leaves as all of the other hedges in that particular area.

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how do you know if a black man's been on your computer it's gone

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Rose is Red Violet Blew Mustard is in Clue … What about Moni-… ahhh my eye!

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Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

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Q: How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, possibly two if the lightbulb is high up and someone has to hold the ladder.

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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