Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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knock knock who's there? Kallie Kallie who? sorry, wrong house

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

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A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

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So there are two elephants in a bathtub. Elephant 1: "yo can you pass the shampoo" Elephant 2: "radio!"

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What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

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What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

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What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

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Why did the koala bear fall out of the tree? Because it's dead.

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whats 2+2? gonorrhea.

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am i invited to party? no

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A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

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Women's rights.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

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Why are black people more athletic than whites? Black people originate from Africa, where they lived in a world where athletic ability created natural selection. The most athletic were able to escape dangers of the jungle such as dangerous animals, and were also most apt to find food to survive. Then when the slave trade occured, only the strongest and best fit survived the trip to America and the hard labor. Also, given the socio-economic trends of the United States, African Americans are more likely to grow up in an environment where they have limited opportunity to make a living, besides professional sports, so they play cheap sports like basketball.

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Where's Justin Beiber? With his girlfriend.

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

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What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

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What do you call a Mexican jumping fences? A really good athlete.

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A man rubs a magic lamp nothing happens

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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