Two muffins are in an oven. Muffin 1: Gosh it's hot in here. Muffin 2: Holy Crap! A talking muffin!

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whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

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am i invited to party? no

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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What has 4 legs and goes "meow." A cat. Dang! You already heard it.

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what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

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So there are two elephants in a bathtub. Elephant 1: "yo can you pass the shampoo" Elephant 2: "radio!"

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Two white people walk into a bar what do they say? "hi"

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A man rubs a magic lamp nothing happens

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

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LIKE THIS!

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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How are a bucket and a purple shovel alike? Coincidentally they both are registered sex offenders.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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Sarah Palin

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Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

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If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

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How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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