What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

A baby seal walks into a club...

Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

What's the difference between a joke and an anti joke Bananas

Women's rights.

Q. Where do snowmen keep their money? A. A snowman is an anthropomorphic snow sculpture made of frozen water. They therefore cannot earn, keep or have any use for money.

What do you tell a black man walking down the street with a suspicious look to him. Hey, how's it going?

Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

What does Rubens Barrichelo does with his F1 championship trophies? He never got one.

Why did the bear stick his head in the honey comb? He wanted honey.

What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

Lol, listen, the suggestion lies in the "not not", you are using not twice in your mind, which under trance makes it so your subconcious registers that you are using a double negative while you consciously do not. Look back at the messages and register consciously that you and I have been using "not not" twice during the past messages, when the net shuts down here, you reinforce the "I will totally notnot, tell him" so the suggestion just gets stronger.

Sarah Palin

George Bush.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because he did

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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