A man goes to Church he meets God nothing happens

What will Postman Pat be called after he retires? Pat.

Three a man is trapped on a desert island and a genie offers to grant him one wish. The man accepts the existence of the genie and then wishes for unlimited wishes for the rest of his life. The man takes over the world.

A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

So three Mexicans, a black man, and 2 white men enter a room. They promptly sever their penises and jump out the window because they are all members of a strange cult.

Your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you're just a figment of my imagination.\

they say that cancer can't pass but why do three our your uncles have it

Person A: Hey! Whats up? Person B: Suicide rates...

What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

knock knock who's there? Kallie Kallie who? sorry, wrong house

What do you do when you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

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How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

Guy: If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I would put I and u together. Girl: Really because if I could r-arrange the Alphabet I would put f and u together

Why did the black man get a life sentence in prison? Because he was involved a mass stabbing in a night club London which saw 4 local teenage girls lose there lives.

whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

Why did the wiener dog fight the cock. Because it was a cock-fight.

Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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