What do you call a black man and a white woman who are married? A married couple

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A Mexican, a Jew and an African walk into a bar. Now, it seem it was the Jew's turn to pay for drinks. So, all three ordered drinks, and the Jew paid for them.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A n antelope walks into a bar and many people leave for the sake of their safety and animal control gets called to escort the antelope out of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the bear eat meat? he was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Arron Glass

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why are black people more athletic than whites? Black people originate from Africa, where they lived in a world where athletic ability created natural selection. The most athletic were able to escape dangers of the jungle such as dangerous animals, and were also most apt to find food to survive. Then when the slave trade occured, only the strongest and best fit survived the trip to America and the hard labor. Also, given the socio-economic trends of the United States, African Americans are more likely to grow up in an environment where they have limited opportunity to make a living, besides professional sports, so they play cheap sports like basketball.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Trees are brown.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the Mexican wait outside Home Depot all day? He was hoping to be hired as day-labor to provide for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -116

Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

thumb_up thumb_down +45

hi, im sober.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops